Monday, October 18, 2010

A Man Would Be Proud to Call His Own

It's not your looks, you're very pretty
It's not your style, the way you dress is oh so fresh
It's not the way that you carry yourself

Oh, girl I'm sorry, you're not my kind of girl
'Cause you're the kind of girl
That a man's dreams are made of

From the album Heart Break © 1988 MCA


This topic has been on my mind for the last few weeks and I started it with my post Food For Thought- Your Sunshine Then this morning during some self refection this song came on the radio. I know that the lyrics of this song is where I was headed with that post. So the discussion continues. In a perfect world, a nice, beautiful, caring woman would have a nice, loving, caring man. But we all know we don't live in a perfect world. In the real world, we live with backwards thinking and inside out hearts. Okay, that is harsh, but trust me I have a point.

So the morning goes as such. I was already contemplating the next topic to share with you guys and then this song came on the radio. Well I turned up the volume and began to reminisce. How I love me some New Edition, but that's not the point. The lyrics stood out to me. Seriously, how did I miss this song in the past?? It was exactly what I wanted to say in my previous post, but wasn't sure how to express it. So here you go.

Men, and not all men, tend to sing this song often. If you've ever had those lyrics or their likeness said to you, then you know how devastated and confused you feel. You think you're great, you cook, you listen, you support, you are the ultimate "lady in the streets, and a freak in the bed", so you thought. Then he hits you with the "you're perfect, of course some man would be lucky to have you", but whatever the case may be he isn't the man that wants to have you. Maybe you didn't smile bright enough or you forgot his favorite piece of lingerie is the hot red teddy with the string that goes way up yonder. Whatever it was that triggered an "NE Heartbreak", he doesn't want you. You're heartbroken and you experience a moment of self esteem assassination. You start to question your appeal, and wonder where you went wrong. You think, maybe you should have stuffed that too small piece of thread up your cheeks more than 3 times a week, or maybe letting him air out his insecurities on your "little black" couch more than every three months wasn't enough. The world may never know.

At some point I thought it was just a way out, (which to some degree it is), but I also think more importantly men know exactly what they want regardless of how wonderful you are, even to them. Men get a rep for being selfish, but are they really wrong? Rather or not we agree with a man's notion to sing "You're Not My Kind of Girl", we have to acknowledge that if you have to tell them you're what they want, then chances're NOT.

Women, on the other hand sometimes tend to compromise what they want and work with the possibility that a man could be better. Though this theory never ends well, for whatever reason we expect or want men to do the same. I have to respect the idea that as a woman I should have sung the remix "You're Not My Kind of Man" to several "potentials"on several different occasions.Truthfully, if I could have emotions like a man, then life would be so simple. I'd have a booty like Trina and a mind like a pimp, I'd rule the world (joking).

Seriously, is the way men think really that outrageous or should women just use the same logic and stop sacrificing??

I know for me, I'm going to get what I want and if not I'll be remixing some songs.  Later Chicas!

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