Letting Go!- Repost 10/17/2009

Sometimes we are so hurt and torn down we don't  realize the extra pain that we cause ourselves by allowing old wounds to remain unhealed. I think the first step in completely healing a wound is realizing that it is there! It's easy to cover scars with bandages and never acknowledge that they exist.

Hurting and healing is one of the most difficult task in self-help. The hardest aspect is allowing yourself to hurt. Often times we guard ourselves after heartache so that no one else or nothing else will hurt us again, With this wall, we not only block pain from coming in, we also block its' ability to escape, keeping it trapped in forever.

This year has been all about setting, achieving and exceeding goals I've made for myself. (Believe me the list is intense). I am down to the last few months of the year, and I can say I have successfully achieved most, if not all. Well late on the list I am adding "letting go". I will no longer hold the wall of protection that won't allow past pains to escape, instead I am breaking down each brick of the wall and allowing bad experiences, heartache, disappointment, etc. to find their way out (with some forced guidance of course).

With my new added task, I'll be even more mentally occupied than expected. But I am willing to block off some time in my schedule for some TLC for myself. This year my expectations have grown, my acceptance has become limited and I am anticipating the best that my new life has to offer.

Letting Go Phase 3 “Finding Yourself”

Finding yourself through pain can be difficult. When we are hurt we internalize the pain and somehow view the person actions as a reflection of who we are. But in reality their behavior is what is wrong and not you as a person.

Children are placed in time out for their bad behavior, but as adults, people tend to believe that their actions don’t deserve punishment. More times than not they even justify their own bad behavior by belittling the other person. Ego, pride, self esteem, etc. all play a key role in how the guilty party reacts in a situation. It is simple to place the blame on the other person rather than admitting and apologizing for their wrong actions.

In a time of hurt and despair it is easy to absorb hurtful words and believe in some way you deserved to be mistreated. Although it is easier said than done, to move pass this stage of letting go, underneath all the pain is the truth. Find who you are and have always been and do not allow anyone to change that. If you are a kind, gentle, and caring person continue to be that person. Society tends to view loving people as weak, but it takes far more strength to be graceful and loving than it does to be cruel and malicious.

Do not worry about what others may think, because in the end you know the truth and that is what has to hold you together in order to move forward.