What I'm Lovin at the Moment!

What I’m Lovin at the Moment

1. Writing again. Since school is done I now have more time to write. I absolutely LOVE to write and this week I realized it brings joy to my life and calms me when I am nervous, anxious, upset, stressed, etc. 
2. Working Out. Again one of those things I have been using to refocus and keep moving on those down days.
3. Skinny Cow Treats- These are delicious and over excellent portion control. I love em.
4. My curls- I noticed my textured seems to be curlier. Feels like forever since my hair has been in its curly state and the curls are more defined than ever.
5. Love Songs- I was a bridesmaid at a beautiful wedding last month and the bride and groom blessed us with a CD of the songs from their wedding. I must admit I am loving it. 
6. T.V. (The idiot box) I promised myself after school I would devote a few months to T.V. and trashing reading. Hey, I need a break from so many serious issues.

Food For Thought- Where Have You Been?

"Sometimes its okay to get wrapped up in ourselves"...that's where I've been and I am learning a lot, I will share very soon. We need time to reflect on love, loss, success, failure, and maturity. I have met some inspiring people in the course of this past year. I have more than enough to share with my readers. Stay tuned.

Food For Thought- Changes

Have you ever wanted to change for the better?

I've been doing some self reflecting and there are a couple of things I would like to change about myself personally. I am not speaking physically, but more on a personal level.  For example, have you wanted to spend more time with a particular friend, listen more, speak more, be more patient, be more attentive, ect. Has anyone successfully made a change in there life that made them feel a little better?

The 2nd Month of the Year

I claimed this year would be great, but despite my claim to happiness, this year has been a roller coaster. We are only in the second month of the year, and I think I have experienced most emotions known to mankind. I know Life never gives us more than we can bear, but I am convinced that I must have unlimited bearable miles stamped on my heart. I also know some things are meant to make us stronger (so they say), while others are meant to teach us a lesson. Well I must be the strongest, smartest,  life learner yet, because I keep getting a new chapter of life to study. It's harder for me to watch the people I care for struggle or hurt, than it is for me to suffer. I have a "fix it" attitude about everything, and unfortunately all things can not be fixed, nor are they in my control. So for now I lay back in the cut and wait for life to throw me another curve ball. I won't let this bumpy start get me in a funk, instead I'll say, "see you at the end of the month Life, and we can recap our 28 days".
 

In A Writer's Hell

Neither of my laptops are currently working and I feel like I am in the middle of a bad dream. For the past  weeks my computers have been on the fritz. I know I am going to need another one, but in the meantime I want to scream to the top of my lungs. To anyone that is glued to their laptop as much as I am, they will understand my frustration.

I am in a writer's hell at this moment. LOL. My computer shuts down whenever it so desires and I can not download any new programs. Yes, I am sad to say the least. But hopefully I will be getting a replacement soon.

On another note, my dear friend said words to me that I will never forget. She said she was impressed and proud of me. That means the world to me. We spoke so fondly of my future. It is great to be surrounded by someone that has seen you at your worst, but still hold you whole for what you are worth. That is a true friend. I have shed tears of joy for her because I have been so happy and proud of her. We encourage each other and trust me she kicks me when I need it and lets me know when I am wrong. I cherish that, it is hard to find and very rare. Do you all have at least one person like that in your life that inspires you?

Letting Go!- Repost 10/17/2009

Sometimes we are so hurt and torn down we don't  realize the extra pain that we cause ourselves by allowing old wounds to remain unhealed. I think the first step in completely healing a wound is realizing that it is there! It's easy to cover scars with bandages and never acknowledge that they exist.

Hurting and healing is one of the most difficult task in self-help. The hardest aspect is allowing yourself to hurt. Often times we guard ourselves after heartache so that no one else or nothing else will hurt us again, With this wall, we not only block pain from coming in, we also block its' ability to escape, keeping it trapped in forever.

This year has been all about setting, achieving and exceeding goals I've made for myself. (Believe me the list is intense). I am down to the last few months of the year, and I can say I have successfully achieved most, if not all. Well late on the list I am adding "letting go". I will no longer hold the wall of protection that won't allow past pains to escape, instead I am breaking down each brick of the wall and allowing bad experiences, heartache, disappointment, etc. to find their way out (with some forced guidance of course).

With my new added task, I'll be even more mentally occupied than expected. But I am willing to block off some time in my schedule for some TLC for myself. This year my expectations have grown, my acceptance has become limited and I am anticipating the best that my new life has to offer.

President Barack Obama- Back 2 School Speech

I know the kids have been in school in some areas for over a month now. Since this is the last week in September and all kids should be officially adjusted to the routine of earlier bedtimes, sunrise awakenings and homework, in keeping with tradition of my blog, I decided to post the President's speech.  You can view last year’s post "Education is Power" http://brownskinmind.blogspot.com/2009/09/education-is-power.html Similar to last year my daughter and I watched the speech together. I pointed out statements to her that I thought would stick in her mind. Especially some of the things I tell her on a regular basis.

"But just because you’re not the best at something today doesn’t mean you can’t be tomorrow"- Obama


That is such a true statement. Although his speech is for the kids, I find many points in it encouraging for myself as I continue on my journey of "higher" education. It is never too late to believe in yourself. At least, that is my motto. 

I was a little disappointed that the Chicago Public School system did not have a viewing in the classrooms. Last year it was so predictive how many parents were against the speech being shown at schools. Some people fight the oddest battles. You protest against someone positively speaking to your children about education, but you let them watch the Simpsons or Family Guy? (Nothing against those shows, I'm just saying)

Anyway, the month of September would not be complete on my blog without including the President's speech. If you didn't get a chance to watch, I encourage you to read below and share your thoughts. I hope everyone is having a wonderful school year thus far, the kids are making new friends and learning new things.

Retrieved September 30, 2010 from http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2010/09/13/remarks-president-barack-obama-prepared-delivery-back-school-speech 

The White House

Office of the Press Secretary

For Immediate Release

September 13, 2010

Remarks of President Barack Obama -As Prepared for Delivery - Back to School Speech

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

September 14, 2010

As Prepared for Delivery—

Hello Philadelphia! It’s wonderful to be here. Today is about welcoming all of you and all of America’s students back to school – and I can’t think of a better place to do it than Masterman. You’re one of the best schools in Philadelphia – a leader in helping students succeed in the classroom. And just last week, you were recognized as a National Blue Ribbon School for your record of achievement. That’s a testament to everyone here – students and parents, teachers and school leaders. And it’s an example of excellence I hope communities across America embrace.

Over the past few weeks, Michelle and I have been getting Sasha and Malia ready for school. And I bet a lot of you are feeling the same way they’re feeling. You’re a little sad to see the summer go, but you’re also excited about the possibilities of a new year. The possibilities of building new friendships and strengthening old ones. Of joining a school club, or trying out for a team. The possibilities of growing into a better student, and a better person, and making your family proud.

But I know some of you may also be nervous about starting a new school year. Maybe you’re making the jump from elementary to middle school, or from middle to high school, and worried about what that’ll be like. Maybe you’re starting a new school, and not sure how you’ll like it.  Or maybe you’re a senior who’s feeling anxious about the whole college process; about where to apply and whether you can afford to go.

And beyond all these concerns, I know a lot of you are also feeling the strain of these difficult times. You know what’s going on in the news and your own family’s lives. You read about the war in Afghanistan. You hear about the recession we’ve been through. You see it in your parents’ faces and sense it in their voice.

A lot of you are having to act a lot older than you are; to be strong for your family while your brother or sister is serving overseas; to look after younger siblings while your mom works that second shift; to take on a part-time job while your dad is out of work.

It’s a lot to handle; it’s more than you should have to handle. And it may make you wonder at times what your own future will look like; whether you’ll be able to succeed in school; whether you should set your sights a little lower, and scale back your dreams.

But here is what I came to Masterman to tell you: nobody gets to write your destiny but you. Your future is in your hands. Your life is what you make of it. And nothing – absolutely nothing – is beyond your reach. So long as you’re willing to dream big. So long as you’re willing to work hard. So long as you’re willing to stay focused on your education.

That last part is absolutely essential – because an education has never been more important. I’m sure there will be times in the months ahead when you’re staying up late cramming for a test, or dragging yourselves out of bed on a rainy morning, and wondering if it’s all worth it. Let me tell you, there is no question about it. Nothing will have as great an impact on your success in life as your education.

More and more, the kinds of opportunities that are open to you will be determined by how far you go in school. In other words, the farther you go in school, the farther you’ll go in life. And at a time when other countries are competing with us like never before; when students around the world are working harder than ever, and doing better than ever; your success in school will also help determine America’s success in the 21st century.

So, you have an obligation to yourselves, and America has an obligation to you to make sure you’re getting the best education possible. And making sure you get that kind of education is going to take all of us working hand-in-hand.

It will take all of us in government – from Harrisburg to Washington – doing our part to prepare our students, all of them, for success in the classroom, in college, and in a career. It will take an outstanding principal and outstanding teachers like the ones here at Masterman; teachers who go above and beyond for their students. And it will take parents who are committed to your education.

That’s what we have to do for you. That’s our responsibility. That’s our job. But here’s your job. Showing up to school on time. Paying attention in class. Doing your homework. Studying for exams. Staying out of trouble. That kind of discipline and drive – that kind of hard work – is absolutely essential for success.

I know – because I didn’t always have it. I wasn’t always the best student when I was younger; I made my share of mistakes. In fact, I can still remember a conversation I had with my mother in high school, when I was about the age of some of you here today. It was about how my grades were slipping, how I hadn’t even started my college applications, how I was acting, as she put it, “casual” about my future. It’s a conversation I suspect will sound familiar to some of the students and parents here today.

And my attitude was what I imagine every teenager’s attitude is in a conversation like that. I was like; I don’t need to hear all this. So, I started to say that, and she just cut me right off. You can’t just sit around, she said, waiting for luck to see you through. She said I could get into any school in the country if I just put in a little effort. Then she gave me a hard look and added, “Remember what that’s like? Effort?”

It was pretty jolting, hearing my mother say that. But eventually, her words had their intended effect. I got serious about my studies. I made an effort. And I began to see my grades – and my prospects – improve. And I know that if hard work could make the difference for me, it can make the difference for you, too.

I know some of you may be skeptical about that. You may wonder if some people are just better at certain things. And it’s true that we each have our own gifts and talents we need to discover and nurture. But just because you’re not the best at something today doesn’t mean you can’t be tomorrow. Even if you don’t think of yourself as a math person or as a science person – you can still excel in those subjects if you’re willing to make the effort. And you may find out you have talents you’d never dreamed of.

You see, excelling in school or in life isn’t mainly about being smarter than everybody else. It’s about working harder than everybody else. Don’t avoid new challenges – seek them out, step out of your comfort zone, and don’t be afraid to ask for help; your teachers and family are there to guide you. Don’t feel discouraged or give up if you don’t succeed at something – try it again, and learn from your mistakes. Don’t feel threatened if your friends are doing well; be proud of them, and see what lessons you can draw from what they’re doing right.

That’s the kind of culture of excellence you promote here at Masterman; and that’s the kind of excellence we need to promote in all America’s schools. That’s why today, I’m announcing our second Commencement Challenge. If your school is the winner; if you show us how teachers, students, and parents are working together to prepare your kids for college and a career; if you show us how you’re giving back to your community and our country – I’ll congratulate you in person by speaking at your commencement.

But the truth is, an education is about more than getting into a good college or getting a good job when you graduate. It’s about giving each and every one of us the chance to fulfill our promise; to be the best version of ourselves we can be. And part of what that means is treating others the way we want to be treated – with kindness and respect.

Now, I know that doesn’t always happen. Especially not in middle or high school. Being a teenager isn’t easy. It’s a time when we’re wrestling with a lot of things. When I was your age, I was wrestling with questions about who I was; about what it meant to be the son of a white mother and a black father, and not having that father in my life. Some of you may be working through your own questions right now, and coming to terms with what makes you different.

And I know that figuring all that out can be even more difficult when you’ve got bullies in class who try to use those differences to pick on you or poke fun at you; to make you feel bad about yourself. In some places, the problem is more serious. There are neighborhoods in my hometown of Chicago, where kids have hurt one another. And the same thing has happened here in Philly.

So, what I want to say to you today – what I want all of you to take away from my speech – is that life is precious, and part of its beauty lies in its diversity. We shouldn’t be embarrassed by the things that make us different. We should be proud of them. Because it’s the things that make us different that make us who we are. And the strength and character of this country have always come from our ability to recognize ourselves in one another, no matter who we are, or where we come from, what we look like, or what abilities or disabilities we have.

I was reminded of that idea the other day when I read a letter from Tamerria Robinson, an 11-year old girl in Georgia. She told me about how hard she works, and about all the community service she does with her brother. And she wrote, “I try to achieve my dreams and help others do the same.”  “That,” she wrote, “is how the world should work.”

I agree with Tamerria. That is how the world should work. Yes, we need to work hard. Yes, we need to take responsibility for our own education. Yes, we need to take responsibility for our own lives. But what makes us who we are is that here, in this country, we not only reach for our own dreams, we help others do the same. This is a country that gives all its daughters and all its sons a fair chance. A chance to make the most of their lives. A chance to fulfill their God-given potential.

And I’m absolutely confident that if all our students – here at Masterman, and across this country – keep doing their part; if you keep working hard, and focusing on your education; if you keep fighting for your dreams and if all of us help you reach them; then not only will you succeed this year, and for the rest of your lives, but America will succeed in the 21st century. Thank you, God bless you, and may God bless the United States of America

Am I Wise?

Product Description 

"Start down the "magical" road to "sweet" surprises! This adorable version of the classic CANDYLAND game features the colored cards and fun illustrations that kids love, with different "destinations" like Cupcake Commons and the chunky Chocolate Mountains. Choose your cards, move your pawn and let your imagination soar as you make your way to the castle to win!

It is funny to me how many people live their lives just as the product description of this game. They have no plan, no direction, and no stability. Every step in their life is a surprise. Simple tasks like paying bills is a shell shocker each month because before they get paid they've already spent the paycheck on trivial things, not giving much thought to how the rent/ mortgage will be paid or even how they will eat next week.

Each job is a different destination because they are still "finding themselves".

Then these toxic people enter your life and your the pawn. They move you along and let their "imagination soar" as you stupidly follow. What the hell? So goes my theory, ya'll know I have a theory for everything. Well, here you go: if you don't have the common sense to turn around and run when someone is leading you in a dark forest with no flashlight, map, or destination, then you need to walk smack dead into a tree. I'm just saying.

I am proud of the decisions I have made in my life to this point. I have learned some hard lessons, cried some very wet tears, let go of some things I once held too tightly, found new friends, loved deeply and hurt even deeper. At this point in my life I know what I like, what I want, and what I can't tolerate. If only I'd known these things in my twenties, trust me I hit a tree ONCE, and it knocked me right on my "bottom part". (smiles)

It's funny how when you are a teenager you think you know everything, in your twenties you've figured out the world, and when you hit thirty you realize you didn't know anything and now your proceed with caution. With the experiences both good and bad, this decade of my life is different. I see things for what they are and not for the way they should be.

So I ask myself, am I wise?

Hell no, but I bet I now  know better NOT to walk in the dark, plus the wisdom is getting there. Can you say the same or are you stuck in "Candy-land" trying to figure out the next best move to make? Or are you walking blinding into a tree?

Candy-land is the easiest childhood game to play and if you are over thirty and you keep get sent back to start, then it is time to grow the hell up!

I Can't Sing A Note: But I've Been Singing My Heart Out

“Woman I beg your forgiveness

And I'll do whatever it takes

And may the Lord be my witness

Honey I never meant to treat you this way

Sugar your heart has been broken

But I could still see true love shine in your eyes

When every word has been spoken

Woman I'll love you for the rest of my life” -

By Kem - Universal Motown Records (2010) 

I absolutely love this song. I think I listen to it about 20 times a day. It is clearly an “I messed up, take me back” song. But the last few times I heard it, I listened to it from a different perspective. I started singing the song to myself. I mean looking in the mirror singing out loud with all my heart singing. Suddenly the words meant so much more. I started feeling like I was singing the “I messed up, give me another chance” directly to me.

Okay, you are probably thinking what is this girl talking about?? The song just got me to thinking about how bad a person feels when they are in a painful relationship with someone and all the emotional hurt they go through. Well I have been down that dark road and when I stepped back I just look and say, “it wasn’t worth it”. I must have been foolish to ever treat myself so wrong. Loving someone that doesn’t love back, giving your all and then your left feeling empty. You temporarily lose yourself. Well no more, it’s time for me. So I just sing to myself: “I’ll never hurt you again Girl I, I know you deserve a better man, Girl IIIIIIIIIII, I was a fool to ever let you down”

Oh a serious note, you really do let yourself down when you don’t allow happiness to outweigh the rough times. Though there is pain and heartache, I am still a believer in true love. One day I will have stars in my eyes again. So again, I’ll never allow myself to hurt like that again.

I know, this is a weird way to listen to a song, but the words carry a strong meaning to me and I interpret things differently. Most people would envision a man singing it to a woman, but trying singing it to YOU and hear the meaning behind the words. We can hurt ourselves more than any individual and just like we forgive others, we also must forgive ourselves. I hope you can find a different meaning in the songs you love. God knows I can't sing, but I've been singing my heart out. What can I say, it makes me happy!

My Hopes for the Future

I have been contemplating my wants over the past week. I have never focused on what is that I want in life. I have always focused on making sure others around me were happy and taken care of. But these last few years have taught me that it is more important to take care of myself first in order to take care of others.

My hopes for the future are simple, yet so complicated. I want to be happy. Truly happy. I don't need riches or material things to accomplish this I just need to tune the channel on ME. I have never been selfish before, so I can't wait to see what it feels like.

Food For Thought #3

Parenting- Is it important that your kids like you and laugh with every second of the day? Should you be your child's friend?

Sometimes parents get so involved in being "cool" with their children, they overlook a major detail. Discipline. Unfortunately this is one reason kids are getting out of control, lack of discipline, lack of rules, and lack of preparedness. Allow this to marinate for a moment. If kids were aware of consequences at home, do you think they would have the preparation for consequences of life?